The Puzzle Keeper
by Wedjat
Summary: Yugi convinced Atemu to stay with him instead of leaving for the Spirit World, but at what cost? As it turns out, nothing can stop destiny, not even the Pharaoh. Yugi copes with his guilt and grief as his other half lies on his death bed. AxY. One shot.


**Author's Note:** This story is quite depressing…at least I think so. It made me very sad just writing it. I came up with this idea after reading _My Sister's Keeper_. This story doesn't really have anything to do with the story line of that book, but that book had an interesting point. Life doesn't seem fair, and it never ends up the way you thought it would. And when one life ends, another begins. That's obviously where I got the title, even though the Puzzle isn't even mentioned in the story.

This story contains character death and suicidal thoughts, so this is your warning. I'm not really very big on the whole yaoi thing, but it seemed fitting. It's definitely a Puzzleshipping story.

* * *

*-*-*-*

**The Puzzle Keeper**

***-*-*-***

Sometimes it feels like life isn't worth the effort.

There are moments where you feel as if you don't have the ability to go on. You feel a black hole where your heart used to be, and life seems to drag on at a snail's pace. The pain is so unbearable, but you can't bring yourself to end it. Sometimes the pain is the only thing that keeps you sane, the only thing that keeps you alive.

I made a choice.

I wanted him to be with me always. He was a part of me. He was the other half of my soul. Without him, my life felt incomplete and worthless. I thought I made the right decision in convincing him to stay.

_Life has a habit of twisting fate. _

Everything seemed fine at first. We were happy and together. We were inseparable, and I knew that nothing could change that. We would watch television together and laugh. We would hold each other when it was too cold. We had an unbreakable bond.

_Life has a habit of making you miserable._

I should have known that there were consequences. I should have remembered everything that came along with the burden of life. I should have remembered that he wasn't immortal anymore.

It didn't seem important at first. He started to feel fatigued all of the time. No one seemed to notice.

He began to have painful migraines that caused him to become dizzy. No one seemed to notice.

He began to hallucinate, his worst fears playing out in front of him while we saw absolutely nothing. We tried not to notice.

The truth was, we were so happy to have him in our lives, we didn't _want _to know. Deep down, we all knew that there was something horribly wrong, but we tried to protect our own selfish hearts with ignorance.

Then the first fainting spell occurred. It was the final straw on the camel's back. We snapped out of our delusions and knew.

I made a horrible mistake.

I condemned him to this.

When I begged him to be with me, whispering a desperate 'I love you' in his ear, I knew what I wanted. I was willing to do whatever it took to keep him by my side. But if I had known then what I know now, I would have let him go…hell, I would have cheered him on.

But I didn't, and that's the problem.

_Life has a habit of being unfair._

After a particularly horrible migraine, he had collapsed. We rushed him to the hospital, and the doctors there confirmed what we didn't want to know. My love, my life, was dying.

There was a tumor on his brain, and it was inoperable. It was a hopeless case. The doctors told us that we didn't have much time.

_Life has a habit of being too short._

Day in and day out, I stayed by his side. I hardly spent any time away from him. He was my life, and he was fading fast. I could see it in his eyes.

The once strong Pharaoh was but a shadow of his former self. His regal and commanding tone had vanished, and in its place, a frail whisper. Every word that came from his mouth sent another needle through my heart.

I had condemned him to this.

He tried to convince me that it wasn't my fault. He tried to tell me that any price, even the pain he was in, was worth the time we had spent together. I didn't believe him. I couldn't _possibly _believe him. His pain was excruciating, I could see it in every action. Every time he breathed, he seemed to do so regrettably. Every time he spoke, he despised the weakness within himself.

Every second that ticked by slowly took my life away. My heart was filled to the brim with fear, and hardly a moment passed where tears weren't falling from my eyes.

Life wasn't permanent. It wasn't a guarantee. It was a sham.

We have all been fooled into believing that life is a miracle. I know this to be a lie. We have all been deceived: life is a curse.

Life brings pain and misery. Life brings jealousy and selfishness. Life brings death.

If you're lucky, there are shining aspects of the curse. There are people who make the pain go away and make you smile when you feel that you cannot. I had someone like that once, but once his happiness had faded, as did mine. As soon as he began to die, I did too.

I opened my eyes and spotted him asleep on his bed. There was a ringing in my ears as if I had just been in an explosion. I squeezed the hand I held tightly. His eyes opened slowly and he looked at me. He gave a weak smile. "Aibou…you should get some rest. You look exhausted."

I shook my head. "I can't leave you, not ever."

He grimaced. I couldn't tell if it was because of what I said or his unendurable condition.

"Come closer."

I frowned at the request. Usually, even in his condition, he would argue with me when I refused to sleep. He wasn't a quitter. Nevertheless, I stood and sat on his bed. His smile widened.

"No matter what you have come to believe, the year we have had together was worth all of this."

I looked away from him. "I refuse to believe that. This is all because of me. You wouldn't be in this situation if it weren't for me."

I heard him sigh. "You're right, Yugi. I wouldn't be. And because of that, I thank you."

My eyes flew to his in surprise. "You…thank me?"

He nodded and a hint of the fire that used to be in eyes returned. "You have completed my life."

I frowned. "No…I have ruined it! You're dying! Every second that passes, I die a little inside too. I can't live without you…I _won't _live without you!"

He was obviously not pleased by this. "Yugi!"

I stared at him with wide eyes. The old commanding, confident tone he used to have in his voice had returned, if only for a brief moment.

He looked deep into my eyes. I felt as if he could see everything. Maybe he could, because that would explain what he said next.

"Suicide is not an option."

I inched closer to him. "You're my life! How can you expect me to go on once you're…once you're…" I couldn't finish my sentence. The words were caught in my throat, but they were ringing clearly in my mind: _once you're gone_.

His expression softened. "Live for me. Experience all of the joys of life, and I shall experience them with you."

I stared at him quizzically. "I don't understand…"

He averted his eyes from mine for a moment. "I know that my time is almost up, Yugi. I can feel it." Before I could say anything in response, his eyes met mine once more. "I will always be with you. That isn't just a lame Hollywood cliché either." He smiled, and I returned it shakily. "Our bond is unbreakable, have you not yet realized this? Even when I'm gone from this world, we will still be connected. That is forever, Yugi. Life may not be permanent, but you and I are."

I turned my face away from his and cried. I wasn't sure if they were tears of grief or happiness, or maybe they were both. Somehow I knew his words were true.

After a long silence filled with nothing but my tears, I turned back to his adoring gaze. "I love you, aibou. I am forever and always, yours."

I was barely holding myself together as I moved my face closer to his. Our noses touched, and my eyes bore into his. "You are a part of me. I will always love you, mou hitori no boku…nothing will ever change that."

My lips met his in a soft, passionate kiss. It was brief but sweet. It expressed all of the things I couldn't put into words, and it confirmed our love for one another.

When I pulled away, I opened my mouth to say something else, but it would have been in vain. Deep down, I had known, but I didn't want to know. In reality, the exchange never occurred. The ringing in my ears hadn't been because of an extremely loud explosion.

It was the sound of a flat line on the heart rate monitor.

_Life has a habit of ending._

I had missed my chance to say good-bye. I had slept through it, drowning in my own grief.

I didn't know what to feel. All I knew was that I hadn't been holding his hand when I had fallen asleep. I looked down at the hand that I had been clinging to so tightly. He hadn't even tried to wake me up. He must have thought that it would've been easier this way. He had been perfectly content just holding my hand in his last moments.

I wept softly, holding his hand to my lips. I never got to tell him that I loved him. I never got to see him smile one last time.

But even as my heart tore itself apart in mourning, I knew that he was still with me. In a way, I could still feel his presence. Even though I wouldn't be able to hear his voice again, I could feel him watching over me.

One day we would be together again, but until that day arrived, I would fulfill my promise. Even though the exchange had been in my own mind, it felt as if my partner had been communicating with me somehow. I smiled through my tears as the sun began to rise outside.

When one life ends, another begins.

_Life has a habit of healing._


End file.
